Connor suffered from depression and anxiety from a very young age, but couldn't get help.
He fought with his parents and sister and was constantly angry. He ends up commiting suicide later in the story. (In the cut song "A little Bit of light" we find out that Connor most likely overdose because of the lyrics, "The missing pills missing boy found passed out in the park." This song was cut and therefore is not canon, although the novel corroborates the idea that Connor die of an overdose: "The rest is a blur... I called a rehab guy. He gave me what I needed.")
The novel also reveals that Connor had a history of self-destructive and impulsive behavior; on occasion he would intentionally self-harm, even driving his car into a tree: "There were no deer on the road that night, I can confess it now. I crashed into that tree because I felt like it. My most wrong decisions were always like that. Made in a split second." Connor is also said to suffer from substance abuse, including being high at the beginning of the show.
While not canonical, it is speculated that Connor suffered from an unnamed disorder. Fans suspect Connor either suffered from Bipolar Disorder or a personality disorder, specifically Borderline Personality Disorder.
Appearance[]
According to the description of the novel and the first role played by Mike Faist, Connor Murphy appeared to have long, brown but unkempt hair. He used to always have a bad face and wore dark colors and painted his nails black.
Initially, Connor dresses in a dark gray denim jacket and gray undershirt, along with black jeans that have been loosely tucked in to his boots. Later on, his denim jacket is replaced by a gray zip-up hoodie. He also wears a pair of black combat boots and carries an olive green messenger bag. He has long, unkempt hair, and black painted nails.
In "Dear Evan Hansen: Through the Window," costume designer Emily Rebholz describes Connor's costume choices in greater detail: "He goes to the Army Navy Surplus Store. He thrifts. He does the things that his mom would really hate." Additionally, Through the Window reveals that Connor was intentionally dressed in dark gray, rather than black, in an effort to make him "feel approachable," and to not come across as "so extreme."
Songs[]
"Anybody Have a Map?"[]
Connor makes a small cameo in the first song of the show. This introduces him and gives us our first taste of who he is and what he is like. He appears sarcastic and rude, and apparently high, arguing with his mother about going to school.
"Waving Through a Window"[]
Connor shoves Evan to the ground which leads Evan to start singing Waving Through a Window. In the middle of the song, Zoe apologizes for her brother's actions.
"Waving Through a Window" (Reprise)[]
Connor is in the computer lab with Evan as he sings "Waving Through a Window" (Reprise).
"For Forever"[]
Though Connor does not sing in the song, he is thoroughly mentioned as being there. However, the song is Evan's retelling of a fictional today; it is not a proper representation of the real Connor.
"Sincerely, Me"[]
Connor sings this song with Evan. This song takes place after we discover he has died but occurs while Evan and Jared are writing fake e-mails to "prove" he and Connor were friends. He is in this song as a figment of their imagination, and the things he says are not events that truly happened.
"Disappear"[]
Evan envisions Connor's ghost to help him find out what to do, which leads to Evan starting The Connor Project with his peers.
"Sincerely, Me" (Reprise)[]
Connor sings this song as another fake letter and at first, it's about rehab, but then Jared tries to bring himself into the friendship, which Evan quickly shuts down as it wouldn’t fit with the story he was making up.
"For Forever" (Reprise)[]
Connor sings this song to Evan following Good For You, reminding him of the lie that he's caught himself in.
Relationships[]
Cynthia Murphy[]
Cynthia is Connor's mother. While she tries her best to be a good mother, she and Connor are frustrated by each other. Her approach to handling Connor's illnesses is to try a bunch of different cures, switching to a new one each time it doesn't work. She has a bit of a "fake it 'till you make it" mentality.
Larry Murphy[]
Larry is Connor's father. The two were not very close and had a strained relationship, shown in their interactions. Whereas Cynthia was too lax in her parenting approach, Larry was too rigid. At times, it seems as if Larry was dismissive of his son, writting off Connor's struggles with mental health as a ploy for attention. Cynthia also reports that she had to fight Larry to send Connor to rehab and therapy. However, we learn from To Break In a Glove, that Larry cared deeply for his son and did try to help him.
When Connor committed suicide, he did not seem grief-stricken, though he was and wasn't great at expressing it. In "Requiem," Larry reprimands Connor for hurting their family and for not being the son he wanted him to be. In the novel, Connor mentions that Larry once bought him a car as an "olive branch." However, Connor crashed that car on an impulse prior to the events of Dear Evan Hansen.
Unlike Cynthia, Larry tried to help his son, but there were several instances when his rigid approach to parenting negatively harmed their relationship, such as when he
Zoe Murphy[]
Zoe is Connor's younger sister, whom he has a complicated relationship with. The two were not close, with them fighting in their first appearance on screen and Zoe later calling her brother a psychopath. The relationship seems toxic and was possibly even abusive, as Zoe claims before Requiem that Connor tried to break down her door and threatened to kill her. However, in the novel, Connor says he never threatened to kill Zoe and states he would never actually hurt her (but it is unclear what exactly happened). Either way, Zoe clearly felt distanced from Connor, though she wanted to be close to him (as shown by her interest in what Evan has to say in "If I Could Tell Her"), and admitted to missing him in the novel. Despite this, Zoe says that Connor's "suicide letter" was the nicest thing he ever said to her, showing that the two had a strained and unhealthy relationship.
Evan Hansen[]
Connor alternated between being extremely angry at Evan (because he thought Evan was making fun of him) and tolerating him, going so far as to sign his cast. In the book, it's reported that Connor seems shaken up after shoving Evan, so signing his cast may have been out of guilt. Shortly after signing Evan's cast, Connor becomes angry at Evan when he notices Zoe's name in Evan's letter, thinking Evan is trying to make him lash out so that Evan can tell people that Connor is crazy. However, the audience knows this isn't the case. Connor also says (in the book) that maybe in an alternate world, he and Evan could have been friends.
Jared Kleinman[]
Connor only speaks to Jared once in the musical, when Jared sarcastically calls him a "school shooter" and a "freak." Connor is passive aggressive in response to these comments and Jared backs off, suggesting Connor intimidated him during this interaction. Later, Jared joins The Connor Project, but this is likely out of a sense of justice and helping Evan rather than a sign of positive feelings towards Connor.
Miguel[]
Miguel is introduced in the book, where Connor outlines their relationship. According to the novel, Connor met Miguel at the private school he was expelled from prior to the events of the musical. Miguel was the first openly gay person Connor knew and the two were very close. Connor and Miguel were at least friends but it is implied they hooked up at least once and had romantic feelings for each other. Despite this, the two never dated and Connor admits to being insecure and uncertain about the true nature of their relationship. One day, Miguel noticed marks on Connor's wrists and asked about them. When Connor froze up, Miguel pushed for Connor to open up. Instead, Connor ran away and the two stopped talking. In the novel, Connor admits to texting Miguel before his death, making Miguel the last person Connor reached out to.
Trivia[]
- In the book, it's confirmed he's attracted to both males and females, saying something on the lines of 'I always found myself somewhere in between, the way men and women make me feel'.
- Connor was an avid reader, his favorites books including titles like: White Fang, The Little Prince, Ready Player One, and The Giver.
- He went to an all boys school for awhile (Hanover), which is where he met Miguel. He was expelled from Hanover after weed that was confirmed to be Miguel's however Connor took the fall for Miguel in order to prevent Miguel from getting expelled.
- In the book, it's mentioned that Connor was a fairly talented artist and that he liked to draw. Evan describes Connor's sketches as "Cool, cool cool, my goodness dear Me so cool."
- Connor was a leaked character, and was supposed be a surprise for longtime DEH fans.